Title: An Odd Way to End a Night[1]

Meaning: n/a
Pairing: KyoxShinya
Type: Fluff; YAOI
Rating: R

~*~*~*~*~

It was one of those nights – one of the ones when you really wish it were either very, very late so that everyone would be asleep, or not night at all. So far, their Keen Under the Sun tour was going full swing and with no problems – the crowds were roaring and pumped with energy, the sails were up as high as they’d ever been, and with the release of -saku- shortly on the way, it seemed like none of them should have anything to complain about. Except for the fact that a certain vocalist was giving certain other band-members headaches with his seemingly endless energy ...
“Would ya calm down, ya hyper bastard?!” Die yelped as Kyo dive-bombed onto the hotel bed next to him, sending them both into the air.
Shinya sighed and wished he were in his own room. But, like an idiot, he’d agreed to wind down with the others in what was quickly becoming the communal room, but should have been Kyo’s. Despite their fame and popularity, it was a habitual thing for Kaoru and Die and Shinya and Toshiya, to room together. It was also practical. Neither Die nor Toshiya would ever be awake and ready in time were it not for their hotel-mates. Kyo liked having a room to himself, because it meant he could throw his crap every which way and not worry about it getting lost. But he also liked the constant flow of his friends in and out, because it meant he could bother them or talk to them whenever they were in, so he didn’t get lonely, and not have to worry about them staying forever and never leaving when he wanted to be left alone. The drummer peeked over his shoulder subtly. Nope, not safe. Die was still glaring at Kyo, whose small body was shaking with his laughter. Shinya sighed. Kyo could be such a kid when he wanted to be.
“Can’t,” Kyo grinned maniacally, “Too much energy.”
“So go out and run laps!” the rhythm guitarist growled, standing up in a huff and taking his book with him. He settled himself down in one of the two over-stuffed easy chairs that the room offered, Shinya having staked claim on the other one, hoping that the lack of room was what was preventing the vocalist from jumping on those.
Kyo flopped onto his back, looking ridiculously like a fish out of water, giggling to the point where he sounded hysterical. Kaoru made a noise in the back of his throat and turned the page of his magazine, reaching for his water. The short singer snatched it off the table and took a long pull from the bottle, now laughing as Kaoru’s hand grasped for the object that was no longer there.
“Kyo, give it back.”
“No.”
“What?” the older man stared at him blankly.
“No,” Kyo said, shaking his head emphatically and sending his hair flying in all directions.
“Why the hell not? It’s my water.”
“Say ‘please’,” the vocalist said sweetly.
Shinya snorted in unison with Die. Both looked up, looked at each other, and, having arrived at the same silent decision, nodded shortly to each other. Toshiya, they’d decided, was one lucky bastard. As if he’d known what was going to happen, the bassist had opted to disappear into his room to take a shower, and had said he’d join them later. Instead he fell asleep. Shinya had been allowed to go check up on him, but had been sworn to coming back.
Sometimes I wish that I weren’t so quick to shower after lives.
Unbeknownst to either the drummer or the rhythm guitarist, the two shared the same thought. They were always the fastest when it came to taking showers, and they were the fastest to get to the dressing room in order to do so. Kyo and Kaoru had long ago backed down in respect of their longer legs and quick shower-taking-abilities, and by now it was expected of them to shower first. Unfortunately, it meant they had no real excuse to get out of these “wind-downs”. Shinya and Die shared one last, long-suffering look, then looked down at their respective publications in sync.
“Kyo, give me my goddamned water,” Kaoru was saying.
“I said, ‘say please’.”
“How about I say ‘if you don’t give me that water bottle I’m going to shove it down your throat’?” the taller man growled, “Kyo, I’m not in the mood for these games. I’m tired, and I want to drink my fucking water.”
Kyo pouted and threw the bottle back at Kaoru, spraying most of it over the already annoyed man and the bed he was laying on. Kaoru sat up in surprise, sputtering indignantly and trying to wipe himself off with his hands at the same time. Shinya thought idly that if they had been in a cartoon, Kaoru would have sizzle marks over his head. He peeked up at Die, who was wincing, and figured he had guessed right. He sighed, looking at the clock by Die’s elbow, which read 01:50, and fought the urge to groan out-loud – it was too fucking late for this!
“You little asshole!” the lead guitarist snapped.
“Fuck you, man,” Kyo pouted, “It’s just a bit of water. Not like it’s gonna stain anything.”
“That’s not the point, ankle-biter! The point is that you just stole my water, without asking, refused to give it back, and now have spilled the whole fucking bottle on me. We’ve just played for two hours, we’ve been touring for the last four weeks straight, it’s 02:00, and I’m fucking tired! You tell me that you wouldn’t be annoyed in my place! Go take a fucking nap, you short, hyper-active, maniac!”[2]
“Hey! Enough with the ‘little’s and ‘short’s!” Kyo growled.
“Oh suck it up,” Kaoru hissed back, rolling his eyes, “You’re such a goddamn child sometimes.”
“At least I’m not running around and trying to be the pretentious asshole of a father you are,” the singer retorted, his whole body radiating defensiveness and anger as he curled in on himself and bared his teeth at his band-mate.
“Both of you shut the fuck up!” Shinya yelled, standing up from his chair and whirling around so he was facing his bickering friends. “It’s late, we’re tired, we’ve been playing, blah, blah, fucking blah. We get the point. That’s no reason for either of you to make the rest of the night any more unpleasant than it is already. Kyo, there was no reason for you to do that to Kaoru’s water, Kaoru, stop trying to pick a fight with him about his bloody, mother-fucking height. Honestly, for someone who’s supposed to be mature and our band’s leader, you’re more of a fucking immature teenaged brat than I am. No, you know what, both of you are less mature than I am, for the most part. I feel like your fucking mother sometimes, I swear to god!”
The silence that followed was stunned, and broken only by the sound of Shinya’s book as he threw it down to the floor for emphasis. Kyo, Die, and Kaoru all stared in wonder at their usually tolerant, and silent, drummer. Shinya glared at the singer and the lead guitarist with a death glare worthy enough to rival one of Kaoru’s, as if daring either of them to say anything. Neither of them did. Finally he stomped over to the door, grabbing the coat he’d tossed carelessly on the dresser.
“If any of you need me, call my cell,” he called over his shoulder as he opened it and stormed out.
The silence that followed that was awkward, stunned, and tense, all at the same time. It was broken when the door adjoining the two rooms opened and Toshiya stepped through, looking bleary-eyed, yawning and brushing a hand through his still damp hair.
“What’s all the shouting about?”
Die found his voice first, “Shinya didn’t like the way these two were playing with each other.”
“Huh?”
“We were having a fight over something stupid,” Kaoru broke in, looking down at the bed covers and feeling a little guilty. Shinya had made a lot of valid points in that argument. “So he bitched us out and just walked off.”
“But it’s 02:00!” Toshiya exclaimed, looking at the door anxiously, “And we’re only here for another day – what if he gets hurt or something? He doesn’t know his way around the area.”
“He’s got his cell,” Kyo mumbled, his face turning an interesting shade of red, “He told us to call it if we needed him.”
“You mean this cell?” the bassist asked, holding up the small object.
The others stared at it, each feeling something akin to worry coursing through their blood suddenly. Shinya probably didn’t even realize he didn’t have the cell! And of course none of them knew their way around the area. Where would he go? What if he got lost?
“Come on, we have to go look for him,” the vocalist said urgently, getting up and grabbing his hat and shoes. He was throwing on his jacket and nearly running out the door a minute later.
Kaoru wasn’t far behind him, “Check in the hotel first – I’ll ask the desk if they’ve seen him walking out, okay?”
Kyo nodded shortly, taking off down the halls for the elevators. Kaoru went for the stairs. Luckily, there was an elevator one floor below Kyo, and it came within seconds. He scanned the buttons, looking for all the ones that led to public places. Gym ... pool ... ballroom ... restaurant ... roof gardens ...[3]
“Bingo!” the singer whispered to himself, pushing the button for the roof.
He allowed himself a little smile, pleased with his reasoning. It made sense to start at the top and work his way down, but besides, the restaurant, gym, and ballroom would be closed. And as much as Shinya liked swimming, he wouldn’t have gone there without a suit on. That would have been pointless. The drummer knew as well as any of them that he’d easily get lost walking around on his own, especially at night and with no sense of purpose. He’d probably put his hands into his pockets and discovered the loss of cell phone, which meant he would have done the rational thing and tried to stay in the hotel while still keeping himself locked off. The elevator ‘binged’ when it reached the top floor, and Kyo stepped off it anxiously.
“Shinya?” he called into the darkened night. There was no answer. Either Shinya wasn’t there, couldn’t hear him, or wasn’t answering. Kyo found himself praying fervently, ironically, that it was that Shinya wasn’t answering. “Shiiiiinyaaaaaaa!” he yelled again.
The vocalist moved farther down the main path of the roof garden, stopping every now and then to call out the drummer’s name. Five minutes later, feeling somewhat dejected, Kyo sat, and slumped, on one of the benches – there’d been nothing by way of a response from anywhere. He jerked up as the cell phone in his pocket began to vibrate, fishing it out quickly and flipping it open.
“Moshi-moshi?”
“Kyo,” Kaoru’s voice came through, sounding relieved, “It’s mostly good news. Shinya never left the building, so he’s still here. Unfortunately, everything is going to automatically lock up by 02:30. So we have to find him before it does – I don’t think he knows.”
“No, probably not,” Kyo murmured, “All right. I’m looking on the roof. You check the other places.”
“Hai.”
“Mata,” the singer stood and flipped his phone closed, effectively ending the call as he began his search again. He walked all the way to the edge of the roof, where the paths ended and the wall keeping people safe began. He looked left and right, but saw no signs of Shinya. Sighing, he stopped to lean on the wall and look out over the brightly lit city.
“Pretty, isn’t it?” Shinya’s voice asked softly.
Kyo nearly jumped out of his shoes and off the roof. He yelped as he spun around to face his formerly missing band-mate. “Don’t do that, Shinya! You gave me a heart attack!”
“Gomen na,” the drummer replied, shrugging a little. He moved to stand next to Kyo, looking out over the city the way Kyo had been doing. The vocalist sagged against the wall, resting his arms along the top of it and watching Shinya from the corner of his eye. “It’s pretty, though, isn’t it?”
“Aa.”
“You were looking for me?”
“No, I was looking for Santa Claus!” Kyo huffed, “Baka! Who else could put me and Kaoru through such anxiety attacks when they storm off without their cell phones in a city that they don’t know.”
“Toshiya’s pretty good at it, actually,” Shinya said off-handedly.
“... Point,” the vocalist conceded, “But he’s not the one who stormed out this time.”
“Sorry. I needed air. Quiet. There wasn’t any inside.”
“Stop apologizing. I’m just glad we found you. Everything’s going to lock up soon, you know? At 02:30. Kaoru said. We should get back down stairs.”
Shinya sighed, letting his weight rest heavily against the wall. Kyo turned to him in concern, his hand reaching for the drummer’s back automatically.
“Hey, Shin-Shin, are you okay? What’s wrong?”
“Nan demo nai,” the younger man shook his head, “Just tired, I guess. Worn out. You know I hate seeing anyone fight.”
“Aa,” Kyo murmured, “I’m sorry – I should have been the first to say it. We usually don’t get so into it.”
“I know. But still,” Shinya shrugged, “... It ... scares me, I guess.”
“Scares you?”
“Just ... maybe you’ll push the wrong buttons. Or he will. Then you’ll fight so much that you won’t want to speak to each other. Won’t want to work with each other. We’ve been together for all these years without any real fighting. The thought of Dir en grey suddenly not existing ... “ the drummer’s voice, soft throughout, trailed off slowly towards the end, as if he really couldn’t stand to think about not having the band to fall back on.
Kyo bit his lip in indecision. Finally, he threw his arms around Shinya’s waist, snuggling into the strong, warm body. As expected, Shinya tensed from the sudden contact ... but just as soon he was returning the hug with a vengeance.
“... Gomen ...”
“Don’t be,” the singer shook his head against the crook of Shinya’s neck, “We don’t mean to scare you. I don’t know that I could live if Dir en grey disappeared one day, either. I’d never bring about its downfall of my own accord. Don’t worry.”
“Mmn,” the young drummer murmured.
They stood there together, silent, wrapped in each other’s arms for an amount of time that neither of them really cared to count. It was about them, now, the simple support and comfort they offered each other through the chaste embrace. Words were unnecessary – they would only serve to complicate things that should be left as simple as this. When the time seemed right, Kyo pulled away a little so he could rest his head on Shinya’s shoulder.
“I should call Kaoru. He’s looking for you downstairs – he’ll be worried.”
“Hn. Tell him I’m sorry, ne?”
“Sure.”
Kyo pulled his cell from his pocket, flipping it open once more, and pushed the right buttons to speed dial Kaoru’s phone. It picked up on the second ring.
“Kyo?”
“Aa. I’ve found Shinya. He was on the roof.”
“Thank god,” Kaoru murmured around a sigh of relief, “You both all right, then?”
“Yeah. Shinya says he’s sorry. We’re coming down now, before we get locked out.”
“Okay. I’ll see you at the room.”
“Right. See you.”
“Jya, mata.”
“Mata,” the vocalist said softly. He waited until Kaoru hung up before hanging up himself, then turned back into Shinya’s chest, noting with pleasure that the drummer had yet to let him go. Instead, the younger man had placed one hand in Kyo’s hair, and was currently twisting the strands about gently.
“We should go down,” Shinya murmured before Kyo could say anything, “Don’t want to take too many chances, ne?”
“Aa. Okay. Let’s go.”
Silently, the two band-mates stepped away from each other and began the walk down the garden path. Both could feel the arm of the other brushing against theirs as they walked, though. The hall seemed too harshly lit when they re-entered, and both had to stop, blinking their eyes rapidly to make them adjust to the change. A series of buzzes and rings and clicking sounds made them both jump a little in surprise. Kyo looked at his watch, once his eyes adjusted and he could see it, and laughed a little.
“That was close.”
“What was?”
“It’s just now 02:30. We just made it back in.”
“Oh. Wow. That was close.”

The walk to the elevators was short, but the wait for the elevator (the closest was on the second floor), was long. Both stood in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Shinya snuck long glances at Kyo, as if assessing his right to ask an important question. Kyo tried not to squirm under the subtle intensity of Shinya’s gaze.
“Ask.”
“Nani?”
“Ask me, Shin-Shin. Ask your question.”
“I ... nnh. I guess ... do you ever miss the beginning?”
Kyo blinked. Of all the questions he’d been expecting (all two of them), that was not one. He tilted his head to the side, regarding Shinya from the corner of his eye. “That’s a bit ... odd. What makes you ask?”
Shinya shrugged, “I mean ... the simplicity. It was less about touring, less about time restraints and deadlines. More about us. There was more time for us – alone, together, in pairs, what have you. Just more time to hang out and be a person. Less time worrying about the next image to present.”
“True. But that ‘people time’ disappears with fame. Deadlines become the priority. We just have to work within them as best we can. We knew that when we set out to make it.”
“I know. Just ... back there ... ”
“Seemed like old times, didn’t it?” Kyo smiled wryly, “Like when me and Toshiya were living together, and I’d hide at your house when I got him angry at me?”[4]
Shinya smiled and let out a soft, short laugh, “Aa. Like then. When we all used to just hug each other for the hell of it. We don’t really do that anymore unless it’s a big event, did you notice? We don’t even really touch each other at all – on stage or off it.”
The dinging of the elevator bell jarred them both from their wistful and nostalgic bubbles and they entered the car silently. Shinya pressed the button for their floor, and the doors closed with a soft ‘ding’. Kyo frowned, mulling over Shinya’s softly spoken words. It was true, wasn’t it, that they didn’t really touch each other anymore? They didn’t hug each other unless there was a record release, or their single debuted in the top five, or there was a birthday – and then the hugs were short and few and far between. It was something Kyo had missed on the occasion when he felt depressed and just wanted someone’s arms to curl up in so he could bitch to a sympathetic ear and be warm. But considering how busy they all were now, he’d forced himself to pull out of any bouts depression without that support. He hadn’t thought that any of the others might also be missing the casual touches – they all seemed fine without them – so Kyo made himself stop thinking about them, too.
“Kyo?” Shinya asked.
The singer jerked out of his thoughts, looking up at the drummer with slightly wide eyes. He gave a sheepish smile and shrugged, “Sorry. I was thinking again.”
“I’ve told you to stop that – you’ll only hurt yourself,” the younger man grinned.
“Oh, ouch, Shin-Shin. You hurt me so much. ... Nani?”
“‘Shin-Shin’ ... ” Shinya murmured, looking a little awed, “You haven’t called me that in years.”
“Baka! I’ve been calling you that for most of the night.”
This time the drummer shrugged, “I just caught on.”
“Mou ... ” Kyo rolled his eyes and smiled, “Someone’s out of it.” He chuckled when Shinya stuck out his tongue and blew him a mock-kiss. “But ... you outgrew it, I guess,” he said, shrugging again.
The blonde wrinkled his nose a little, “I’m still the one to pick on – you might as well use the name that goes with it.”
“You’re Die’s one to pick on. The rest of us let you grow up.”
“Sometimes I wish you hadn’t,” the drummer muttered, almost too softly to hear. But Kyo knew him too well, and had good hearing when it came to hearing what wasn’t meant to be heard.
“Eh? Not grow up? You want us to see you as a kid?”
“No! That’s not it,” Shinya said quickly. The doors of the elevator opened on their floor, providing him the perfect escape. He stepped out hurriedly and began the short walk to their rooms. “Good night, Kyo-kun. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Ah-ah-ah-ah,” Kyo wagged his finger, stepping between Shinya and the rest of the hallway, forcing the younger man to come to an awkward halt, “You’re coming into my room. Toshiya’s probably asleep again now that Kaoru’s told him you’re all right. He was tired as hell. Die’s probably retreated to his room, too. You’re not going to wake them up, are you?”
“But Toshiya won’t be able to wake up at all tomorrow.”
“Sure he will. You’ll just barge in in the morning. Now come on. Into my room,” Kyo dangled the card key in Shinya’s face with one hand, the other grabbing the drummer’s wrist gently and tugging him in the right direction. Shinya sighed and allowed himself to be pulled along. Kyo grinned in victory. “Good boy.”

They entered the room and found it empty. The door leading to Shinya’s and Toshiya’s room was closed, while the door leading to Kaoru’s and Die’s was left ajar. Kyo motioned for Shinya to stay where he was in the room, and slipped through the crack. The drummer leaned against the hotel dresser and crossed his arms, waiting. Some murmuring and a few minutes later, the smaller man came back through the door and gave Shinya his cute, lopsided smirk.
“Kaoru said never to worry him like that again, and that he’s glad you’re back,” he mocked their leader’s words by pitching his voice higher and rolled his eyes. Shinya snorted. “Oh, and not to apologize for what happened. He knows as well as I do that it was our fault, and he’s sorry.”
The drummer stared at Kyo in mock awe, “Kaoru apologized?”
“Amazing, isn’t it?” Shinya just nodded silently. “First times for everything,” the singer grinned, shrugging out of his jacket and dropping it onto one of the chairs and motioning for Shinya to do the same, “C’mon. Make yourself comfortable.”
A bit awkwardly, the drummer removed his jacket and set it down on the dresser top. Realizing he still had his shoes on, he quickly toed them off and kicked them towards the door. Kyo was already pulling off his shirt and dropping it onto the chair with his jacket.
“I’ll get it in the morning,” the singer muttered, squirming a little under Shinya’s vaguely dis-approving stare, “I’m too tired now.”
Shinya shrugged, “What’ll I sleep in?”
“Uh ... ” Kyo said intelligently, searching around half-heartedly for anything that looked like it might fit the lanky man. He yanked out a huge shirt from one of his opened suitcases and held it out, “Here.”
The younger man accepted the shirt and walked into the bathroom to wash his face and change. When he came out, Kyo was already settled under the covers of his bed, two pillows propped under his head and the two from the other bed placed next to him. Shinya smiled softly and dropped his clothes on the other bed carelessly. Kyo looked up then, and his eyes nearly dropped out of his head.
“Shinya! You didn’t tell me it was so short!”
The drummer looked down at himself, then back at Kyo, then shrugged placidly, “It doesn’t matter. It’s still warm outside, and the blankets are thick. I’ll be fine.”
That’s not what I meant at all ... Kyo thought wistfully, still staring. “Are you even wearing your underwear?”
“Don’t you think you’d be able to tell if I was?” Shinya shot back, grinning mischievously at him.
Well fuck. Then I’m in trouble.
The shirt barely rested below Shinya’s crotch, highlighting the younger man’s legs, which were so perfectly shaped and seemed to go on forever. It had been a long time since he’d seen that much of Shinya’s leg, Kyo realized. Yet another thing to miss about the old days.
Though his thoughts were headed in rather not-PG directions, the shorter man managed to refrain from making untoward comments about said legs, and patted the space next to him. “Come on, you. I’m tired and I want my teddy bear.”
“I knew there was an ulterior motive hidden somewhere,” Shinya chuckled, shaking his head a bit as he slid under the covers and into Kyo’s open arms.
It was warm under there, as he’d predicted, and the drummer couldn’t help but close his eyes and let out a little sigh of content. He felt rather than heard Kyo’s amused laughter, but was too tired to comment on it, regardless. It had been a long time since he’d just been held – no sense in ruining the peaceful moment by bringing on more sarcastic quips at each other.
“Comfy?” Kyo asked quietly, nuzzling his nose into Shinya’s hair.
“Nn,” the younger man murmured. Some time later, Shinya looked up into Kyo’s eyes, “D’you remember ... we used to do this all the time?”
“... Aa.”
“Why did we stop?”
“It just ... didn’t seem to be a thing to do, I guess. You’ve developed such good control over yourself, you know. Most of the time it seems like you don’t need anyone to hold you, and I taught myself not to need it once it seemed like you were beyond it. I forgot to think that you might still want it, anyway.”
“I never did stop needing it,” Shinya admitted quietly, “I learned how to hide my need from you and the others. From the cameras. We were followed by them so much ... I was afraid of the wrong moment getting in a magazine and rumors starting ... ” and I needed to grow up – you can’t be a child in an industry like this, can you? I forced myself into it too quickly, though. I shouldn’t have. I couldn’t get it right – couldn’t figure out the right balance. Still can’t. he sighed, “I didn’t want to cause trouble.”
“Baka!” Kyo murmured fondly, “How could you have ever caused trouble for us? You’re our little baby – we’re supposed to pick and dote on you and let you get away with whatever you do. What should we care if a picture of us hugging is in a magazine? More risque images have appeared before that.”
“I know,” Shinya acknowledged, blushing a little, “It just ... it got to the point where I should have been too old for that. We’re always so rushed and hassled. I didn’t want to bother anyone with something I should have gotten over.”
“Never,” the vocalist said firmly. He put his finger under Shinya’s chin and lifted the boy’s face up so they could look each other in the eye, “You’re never a bother, and you could never bother me with anything. Except maybe by playing Morning Musume on the tour bus loudspeakers in the morning,” he smiled when Shinya chuckled, “But even then, I’d forgive you in a heartbeat, and the others would, too. Okay?”
“ ... Okay,” the drummer agreed quietly. He stared into Kyo’s warm brown eyes, feeling himself melt. Kyo looked sexy enough when he wore his various contacts, Shinya would be the first to admit it, but he’d always preferred the singer’s natural color. His eyes were warm and sincere, and mesmerizing, when they were just their proper brown, and Kyo himself always seemed much more comfortable. As if changing his contacts changed his presented personality. “Kyo-kun?”
“Na?”
The younger man chewed on his inner cheek a little as if debating whether or not he should be asking what he was about to ask, “Remember on our first tour? When I got homesick, and you stayed with me instead of going out with the others?”
Kyo smirked faintly, “Aa. It was a good thing, too, ‘cause they all came back totally plastered, if I remember. And you know me and liquor.”
“Like me and smoking,” Shinya jibbed, wrinkling his nose cutely, “But ... do you remember, before they came back ... I had stopped crying and you wiped away the tears for me? Your hand stayed on my cheek, like this,” he picked up Kyo’s right hand and placed it on his right cheek, “and we just kind of stared at each other, like we are now?”
Kyo gulped softly, subtly, knowing exactly where this was heading. The look in Shinya’s eyes told all. When he spoke again, his answer was tentative, “ ... Aa ... I remember.”
“ ... Were you going to kiss me?”
“ ... Hai.”
“But you never did, because they came back then,” Shinya’s voice had slowly dropped to a whisper. The singer nodded, his eyes a little wider and his breathing just the tiniest bit heavier than usual. “Will you kiss me now? To make up for it?”
The vocalist’s nod of affirmation was hardly perceptible; the drummer felt more than saw it. Kyo’s breathing was rushed as he leaned down. Shinya’s breathing was calm as he tilted his head back and closed his eyes. The kiss was everything and nothing like the younger man had expected it to be. Kyo’s lips were warm and soft and inviting, and he tasted very faintly of his last cigarette. There was something awed in the way his lips moved against Shinya’s ... almost as if he were suddenly shy, or couldn’t believe this was happening to him. The drummer parted his lips slightly, granting a deeper, more intimate access. Kyo took him up on the offer, his hand moving down from Shinya’s cheek and coming to rest at the nape of his neck to pull him closer. The singer’s tongue was gentle as it moved inside of Shinya’s mouth, exploring the nooks and crannies. When they broke apart, both were a little breathless.
“Domo,” the drummer murmured.
“Nan demo nai,” Kyo sighed, his voice soft and a little hoarse. His hand never left Shinya’s neck, instead staying there and gently massaging the skin.
Shinya shuddered under his touch and moved closer, reaching to touch Kyo’s neck with his lips and trailing kisses over it. The vocalist shivered, but tilted his head back to allow the drummer better access nonetheless.
“You’re warm,” the drummer sighed against Kyo’s skin. He licked the patch of skin he’d just kissed. Kyo’s shiver was more prominent this time. The younger man smiled.
“It’s warm under the covers,” Kyo managed gruffly, clearing his throat.
A soft laugh, little more than a breath, released itself from Shinya’s lips. It was warm against Kyo’s skin, drifting lazily over the damp patch made by Shinya’s tongue, and made him squirm slightly. The blonde pressed back into Kyo’s hard body, letting his fingers trail gently down the older man’s side – in response Kyo’s nails nearly dug welts into his back.
“Damn you, Shin-Shin, you know I’m ticklish!”
Shinya chuckled. “Can’t help it. Your skin is just so soft and pretty,” he teased, “It’s like a little baby’s.”
“I’ll show you ‘baby’,” Kyo growled.
Before Shinya could react in any way, the vocalist had flipped himself on top of Shinya and was straddling his waist. A second later, Shinya found himself devoid of a shirt, and Kyo had very deftly proceeded to all but tear the cloth off of him. And before he could react properly, Shinya’s hands were firmly trapped within Kyo’s grasp – both hands locked around his wrists – and Kyo’s mouth was attached to his neck. The singer scraped his teeth over Shinya’s collar bone roughly, making the drummer wince slightly. Then he bit down on the hollow of the younger man’s neck and began sucking, bringing blood to the surface until he was marked to Kyo’s satisfaction. Shinya, by that point, was mostly reduced to a mass of quivering jelly – Kyo’s crotch was very steadily grinding into his own and causing a massive rush of blood to the general area, and the singer was bent over so that their chests brushed against each other’s with every movement.
The shorter man chuckled and pulled away a little, grinning crookedly, “Doesn’t take you much, eh Shin-Shin?” He recaptured Shinya’s lips, swallowing the indignant noise of protest that the drummer made. Soft moans escaped the drummer’s throat unconsciously.
Kyo sat back and smirked, admiring the way Shinya’s chest heaved with his heavier breaths and the fine sheen of sweat that had accumulated on it. “You look beautiful like that,” he murmured, bending back down and meshing his lips firmly against the younger man’s.
Shinya responded immediately, parting his lips and snaking out his tongue to meet Kyo’s. Meet they did, and the drummer allowed Kyo to lead them in the age-old dance of intimacy – not out of any particular submissiveness, but more simply because Kyo was damned good at it. Idly Shinya wondered when and where the vocalist had gotten so much practice – and quickly he squashed that train of thought before it could make him jealous and end the moment. He wasn’t stupid. There would be no declarations of undying love – he wouldn’t want them and Kyo was of no mind to tie himself to one person – this was, if anything, something born of curiosity and casual passions. It would be over when it was over and Shinya wouldn’t do anything to end it sooner.
When they pulled away, Kyo’s lips were still so close that they brushed against Shinya’s as he murmured, “You taste good, Shin-Shin ... but what do you taste like farther down, hmmm?”
“You could find out ... ” Shinya whispered in reply, arching his back off the mattress to press his chest against the singer’s encouragingly.
Kyo grinned, in a manner that struck the drummer as being positively wicked, and snaked out his tongue to lick the younger man’s lips teasingly. Shinya parted his lips slightly, his own pink tongue resting just on the inner edge of his bottom lip. The shorter man traced Shinya’s lips with his tongue on the next pass. “Come out and play with me, Shin-Shin,” he whispered.
Taking the hint, the drummer met Kyo’s tongue in mid-air, caressing it gently. Kyo rewarded him with a very soft, barely-there moan. Shinya smirked, and reached up to kiss along the underside of the shorter man’s jaw line, leaving a wet trail in his wake. On the second pass, he stopped at the singer’s jugular vein, which he kissed softly. Kyo shivered visibly and Shinya chuckled.
“Please, Kyo,” he murmured.
The singer nearly jerked off the bed from the sensation, but managed to save himself from said embarrassment. Instead he tightened his grip on Shinya’s wrists to the point of bruising the flesh lightly. He gave a low growl of warning before attacking Shinya’s nipples, already hard because of the constant stimulation. Shinya gasped as Kyo bit down on his left nipple, none too gently, and his torso arched off the mattress, seeking more of the vocalist’s hot mouth. Kyo just smirked and repeated the treatment with the right nipple. The drummer moaned in frustration as he tried to wrap his arms around the vocalist and was denied that movement.
“Kyo ... why won’t you ... let me touch ... you?” he ground out. Trying to concentrate when Kyo was tracing patterns on your chest with his tongue, he realized, was very difficult indeed.
“Shh, shh,” Kyo hushed in his most soothing voice, “Enjoy this, Shin-Shin. You’ll be able to touch me soon enough.”
The vocalist placed his free hand under Shinya’s neck and tugged, urging the drummer to raise his head. Shinya complied quickly, though he shot Kyo a faint questioning look. The shorter man simply shook his head and moved Shinya’s captured hands so they rested under his neck and he could scoot down to straddle the drummer’s knees. He leaned down once more, one hand still holding onto Shinya’s wrists firmly. He dipped his tongue into the drummer’s belly-button briefly, enjoying the way the younger man’s stomach muscles quivered under him. He kissed a short trail from there to the nestling of hair, which he tugged on gently with his teeth as he made his way down the last few inches, nosing Shinya’s erection in a loving manner.
“Kyo ... ” Shinya whined.
Kyo giggled and lashed out his tongue, licking up along the vein. The drummer gasped out loud, and his whole body trembled. The singer smirked victoriously as he circled the head of Shinya’s penis with slow, teasing strokes of his tongue, reducing Shinya to a bundle of quivering nerves.
“Goddamn it,” Shinya whined softly, his voice going up a few notes. He tried to thrust his hips up, but Kyo’s weight prevented that.
“Now, now,” Kyo said reprovingly, “Keep that up and I won’t do anything.”
The younger man stared back at him, wide-eyed and looking more than a little pleading. Kyo just shrugged and gave him a smug smile and a little shrug as if to say, ‘dare me’? Shinya shook his head almost frantically, and the singer laughed. He kissed the drummer’s inner thigh softly and returned to his previous task, though with much less teasing – even he could only stand so much, and his own need was making itself known in a big way. With a final kiss to the tip of Shinya’s erection, he engulfed it in his mouth. Shinya screamed. Not pausing to worry about one of the others waking up, Kyo set to work with his tongue and jaw, sucking and scraping his teeth gently every now and again to liven things up. The younger man writhed underneath him and the singer delighted in it. He opened his mouth a little wider and forced his throat muscles to relax as he moved slowly downwards, changing the angle to allow more of Shinya’s cock to enter his mouth. Never before had Kyo heard Shinya so loud so constantly – the young drummer had yet to stop panting and moaning.
“Gods ... Kyo ... so ... ah-nnng ... close ... ” Shinya managed to gasp out.
Kyo simply ‘hn’ed and smirked, moving his tongue against Shinya’s erection in soft, pumping movements. A few moments later Shinya’s body tensed completely as orgasm crashed over him and he released into Kyo’s ready mouth. The vocalist swallowed steadily, catching every drop on his tongue, and laved his tongue around Shinya’s cock to clean it. He sat back and smiled softly, watching the drummer’s chest heave as the young man tried to catch his breath.
“Enjoy yourself?” Kyo asked softly, leaning down to kiss Shinya’s lips, in an absurdly chaste manner considering what they’d just done.
Shinya smiled against his lips and reached out his tongue to touch Kyo’s lips. Kyo parted them and let the drummer’s tongue slide into his mouth. The younger man explored the hot cavern curiously, tasting himself there. The shorter man pulled away to rain kisses all over Shinya’s face. The blonde tried to keep himself from giggling as Kyo began nibbling on his ear lobe, but ultimately failed.
“Ticklish, Shin-Shin?” the vocalist asked, grinning like a delighted child, “Well that’s new.”
He dove back down and applied his teeth and tongue to Shinya’s left ear, nibbling and licking lightly. Shinya giggled more and squirmed under the attack, but Kyo still held fast to his wrists – as he had the whole night. The drummer gave a half-hearted attempt at bucking Kyo off of him, but all he succeeded in doing was making the vocalist moan softly and let his head fall back as he brushed his hips against Kyo’s *very* hard erection.
“Maa, Kyo-kun ... you haven’t been taking care of yourself, have you?” Shinya teased, rolling his hips up again, “Not even out of your boxers ... tsk, tsk.”
“Don’t ... tease ... Shin-Shin ... ” Kyo panted, resting his weight on his hands, and thus on Shinya’s wrists. The drummer winced, sure that he was going to have hand-shaped bruises there in the morning. Kyo kissed his shoulder in apology.
“Do something about it, Kyo,” the blonde murmured, lifting up his leg to rub Kyo’s crotch, “ ... Let me help you with that. ... Take me.”
“Ah – are you sure?” the singer breathed.
“Do I sound like I’m joking?” Shinya whispered, raising an eyebrow and lifting his head up to bite Kyo’s bottom lip softly. He tugged it towards him gently before gliding his tongue over it, “It’s an invitation, Kyo, and I don’t accept ‘no’. Please ... have me.”
The vocalist shuddered and bit on the inside of his cheek to stop a potential girly-sounding moan. He obeyed Shinya readily, though, changing his position so that he was no longer straddling the younger man’s legs, but was kneeling in between them instead. The drummer hooked his legs around Kyo’s waist and smirked up at him.
“You’re going to have to let my arms go, you know,” he said smugly.
“Aa,“ Kyo agreed, letting go and leaning back slowly.
Shinya brought his arms back to his sides, equally as slowly, and winced as the blood started to flow back into them, giving him the hated sensation of pins and needles inside his wrists and hands.[5] Kyo took the younger man’s hands in his own and rubbed them gently, kissing them in apology. Using his legs, Shinya tugged on Kyo’s boxers in response. The vocalist quickly removed the offending cloth from his body, looking around in vain for something that could be used as lubricant.
“Kyo, give me your fingers,” the blonde murmured, grabbing Kyo’s hand in his and bringing it to his mouth.
Kyo gave him his patented cute smirk, shivering at the feeling of Shinya’s tongue on his skin. The younger man laved his tongue all around Kyo’s fingers until they were quite wet before releasing them. He threaded his fingers through Kyo’s soft hair as the shorter man pressed two fingers into his entrance, sliding them in in one fluid motion, studying the drummer’s face the whole time. Shinya winced slightly, so he gave him a few seconds to adjust before beginning to scissor them and stretch the hole. He waited a few seconds more before adding the third finger. The drummer made a soft noise of discomfort, and Kyo flinched in sympathy, petting Shinya’s soft hair and kissing him in hopes of comforting him. He wiggled his fingers around, searching for the blonde’s prostate – a sudden bucking of Shinya’s hips up and a strangled noise held in the back of Shinya’s throat told Kyo that he’d found it. He grinned a little.
“Been a while, has it?”
“Nnh,” the drummer agreed breathily.
“You’re lucky I didn’t mind taking my time, then,” Kyo whispered, a tint of evil in his voice.
“Is that a promise or a threat?” Shinya asked, grinning. The vocalist’s fingers moved in him, again brushing over his prostate, and he arched up and whimpered lowly. “Nnngh ... that’s ... not fair, Kyo,“ he ground out.
“I never said I was going to be fair, did I?” the singer hissed, pulling out his fingers roughly.
Shinya let out a silent gasp of pain and surprise, “Ah – !”
“Shh, shh, Shin-ai,” Kyo murmured soothingly, settling himself so that the head of his erection brushed over Shinya’s entrance, “Relax, little baby. It won’t hurt as much if you relax.” He gathered spit in his mouth and spat into his hand, rubbing it over his sensitized flesh. “Are you ready?”
“A – aa.”
Kyo pushed into Shinya steadily, and managed to restrain himself from thrusting in one rough go. Even though the drummer winced, he didn’t stop until he was sheathed fully inside of Shinya, groaning at the tightness of him. Then he paused, panting, to let the younger man adjust to the intrusion. Shinya’s chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath, his hands clutching onto the sheets and his legs wrapped tightly around Kyo’s waist. His eyes were closed tightly. Kyo smiled softly and placed his hand against the blonde’s cheek.
“Shin-ai, open your eyes and look at me,” he instructed softly. Shinya obeyed slowly. “Just relax, Shin-Shin. It’ll feel better in a moment. You know it will.”
Shinya nodded, taking a few more deep breaths. His hand came up to catch Kyo’s, keeping Kyo’s hand held against his cheek, “It’s okay, Kyo. You can move.”
Kyo twined their fingers and obeyed, pulling out a little, keeping his thrusts shallow, not wanting to be far from the drummer’s body. He kept himself propped up by resting his weight on their hands, using his free hand to trace the contours of Shinya’s chest, circling the younger man’s nipples repeatedly. As he moved, the singer shifted ever so slightly back and forth, searching for the angle that would cause him to hit Shinya’s prostate again.
“Nnh – there!” Shinya gasped.
Kyo grinned and snickered, feeling pleased with himself. Shinya clenched his muscles around his erection and the vocalist felt his eyes rolling into the back of his head. He moaned, “God ... do that again.”
The blonde did so readily, and Kyo’s whole body shuddered. The older man snaked his free hand down between their bodies, capturing his penis and coaxing it back to a full erection. Shinya’s body began tensing around him from the multiple sensations, his breaths coming in more erratically as his second orgasm began its descent upon him. Kyo’s own breathing came in harsher pants and he bent down to lick Shinya’s neck spasmodically, trying to keep his self control about him. The steady rhythm he’d set up started to break as he thrust into the body harder and with more abandon. Shinya’s mewling did nothing to help him, and soon Kyo was sinking his teeth into Shinya’s neck as waves of pleasure crashed over him and he came into Shinya with a shudder, sparing just enough thought to speed up the motions of his hand. A moment later the drummer came all over Kyo’s hand and chest, with a strangled cry of Kyo’s name on his lips.
“Gods ... ” Kyo breathed, lowering his weight onto Shinya slowly as he relaxed, reveling in post-coital haze.
Shinya gave a hum of affirmation, wrapping his arms around Kyo’s body and holding him closely. They lay together in silence, unheeding of anything but each other, not wanting to talk lest they ruin the moment, but knowing that they would have to eventually.
Kyo decided to bite the bullet, though he was unsure what to say, “Shin-Shin ... “
”Shh, Kyo-kun,” the drummer murmured soothingly, shaking his head, “Not now. Sleep now. It can wait until the morning.”
“It is the morning,” the singer pointed out with a yawn, “We’ve got to be up in another two hours.”
“So take a nap and it can wait until after breakfast.”
“Aa. All right. Oyasumi nasai.”
“Oyasumi,” Shinya replied, smiling softly as Kyo fell asleep on him.
He tried to shift, but the soreness shooting up his spine and the realization that Kyo was still in him kept him put. The drummer sighed fondly and rolled his eyes, settling down to sleep. When sleep claimed him, the smile was still on his face. And when Kaoru went to wake them the next morning, he snorted, amused, at the sight and went to get Toshiya instead.[6]

~Owari~

NOTES:

[1] The title really has very little to do with the story itself, but rather was born of my own musing that Kyo and Shinya hopping into the sack after everything that had happened before was ‘a rather odd way to end the night’.
[2] In tribute to my friend Piccolo, who’s always telling people to take a nap when they either scare or annoy her.
[3] It’s unlikely that such a thing exists in Japan itself; but it does now for all intents and purposes of this story. Plus, I think it’d be cool.
[4] Not like that ever happened, but it’s an amusing thought.
[5] Don’t know about Shinya, of course, but I hate the “pins and needles” feeling you get after you’ve had circulation cut off and suddenly it’s back. I assume Shinya wouldn’t like it, because not many people do.
[6] Yes, the ending was meant to be completely ambiguous. You don’t know if they get together as a couple, you don’t know if they stay together as fuck-buddies, you don’t know if they agree never to speak of it again. You just don’t know, muwahahahahaaaaah.

Other: You’ll notice that there’s a lot of “speculation” going on between Kyo and Shinya about the “old days”, and the difference between then and what their life is like now. Now, I have no idea whatsoever about what the “old days” might have been like for them. I have no idea what life is like for them now. The “speculations” are my own thoughts and opinions entirely, and do not reflect any of the actual feelings of anyone in Dir en grey, or anyone associated with Dir en grey. Incase you didn’t know, I’m not one of these people.

Other: I also doubt that anything in the opening scene would ever actually happen. It’s there only because I decided it should be. Somehow, Kyo and Kaoru fighting over a water-bottle in all seriousness just doesn’t seem like it would ever happen in real life.